Why didn’t they ever make “Baby’s Quest”?

A baby’s life, formatted as a 90’s PC adventure game…

Look Floor. “You see two books and the fifty small pieces of paper that you just threw everywhere.”

Take Book. “You pick up the book, looking forward to a quiet evening of reading by the fireplace.”

Drop Book. “You put down the book, realizing that your pack was too heavy.”

Take Toy Lipstick. “You pick up the toy lipstick, wondering what you could possibly use this for. It must be in the game for some reason, though.”

Touch Cat. “The cat feels soft.”

Touch Cat. “The cat feels soft.”

Touch Cat. “The cat feels soft.”


Use Toy Lipstick with Cat. “Nothing happens.”


Use Toy Lipstick with Forehead. “Nothing happens.”

Taste Toy Lipstick. “The toy lipstick tastes like all your other toys.”

Use Toy Lipstick with Cat’s Water Bowl. “Mommy picks you up and says ‘No! That’s dirty!'”

Use Toy Lipstick with Cat’s Water Bowl. “Mommy picks you up and puts you in Baby Jail while she makes dinner.”

Use Toy Lipstick with Cell Bars. “Nothing happens.”

Save Game. “Thanks for playing Baby Quest. Come back soon!”


About Sarah

10 years ago, I was a computer science student. 5 years ago, I taught kindergarten. 2 years ago, I trained teachers. Now, I'm a technical writer. I have thoughts about most of these things, but most likely I'll just write about neuroses and why I love Mr. Gatti's pizza. Which might be a neurosis.
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7 Responses to Why didn’t they ever make “Baby’s Quest”?

  1. Jess says:

    Nothing happens… so much of a baby’s life. ^_^

  2. Chay says:

    Sarah takes pictures of baby Talia and posts them online. “Grandma gets extremely happy!”

  3. Laura says:

    LOL! The cat is very tolerant in addition to being soft!

    The “100 Animals” book caught my eye… does it really have 100 animals in it? I recently saw the book “100 Trucks” and it only had 38 trucks in it (I counted!). I was very disappointed!

    • Sarah says:

      “first 100 animals” actually has 107 animals! Unless you don’t double-count the babies from the babies page…then it has only 97.

      • Laura says:

        Good! The “First 100 Trucks” book had things like hot air balloons and boats in it. I was tempted to write someone a letter about misleading our youth. ;)

  4. Ryan says:

    Very creative. Talia is going to master this game eventually!

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